Do you have to have great sex to write great love scenes?
I can't say it doesn't help. Besides, it's so much fun when you have a partner to experiment with. There are some things that just have to be experienced: the combination of visceral feelings and emotions can't be duplicated by a how-to manual. That said, imagination takes off and melds with the individual personas of the characters in a scene. Writing love scenes from both the male and the female point of view requires deep immersion into the character, and once I'm lost in them, the scenes come easily.
Rachelle Ayala, crazy owner of this blog, author of Broken Build, available at Amazon
Yes. My feeling is experience is the best teacher. You can read the 'instruction manuals' (for lack of a better description) all day long, but nothing takes the place of actually experiencing, participating in the real deal.
Melisa Williams, upcoming author of Going Native
I think that what makes a great love scene - one that arouses all the senses - is the lead in to the sex, not the sex itself. You could call it foreplay - it's the part that messes with a reader's head and emotions :). How is the interaction constructed between the lovers? How does their connection evolve toward ultimate fulfillment? I think that by the time the down and dirty sex act is warranted, the readers should have already experienced a roller coaster of emotions, so that whether the sex is explicit or not, they don't feel cheated.
Natalie G. Owens, author of Everything to Lose, available at Amazon.
Dariel Raye, author of the Dark Sentinel Series, available at Amazon.
Chantel Rhondeau, author of Always and Forever, available on Amazon.
Absolutely not. But each writer and reader is different. I love reading a juicy, descriptive, sexy love scene and feel like something is missing if the writing isn’t somewhat explicit. I’ve explored a lot in my day to be able to embrace the fabulously committed and loving partnership I have with my sweetie pie. Hence, when I write, I aim for enough descriptive qualities to get both me and my readers stoked. Lately, I’ve been experimenting with suggestive dialogue between my characters – it hints at what is simmering beneath the surface in what I hope is a most delightful manner. But again – to each his or her own. The spectrum for sexual preferences is wide. I’m only going for the slice of the pie that appeals to me and my readers – one that sizzles in a loving way.
Calinda B, Author of the Wicked Series
"My reply to that would be that it takes a vivid imagination to write a good love scene. Plus a definite sense of the dramatic.
I still remember a show I saw online called, "So You Wanna Be a Soap Star?" One week they were doing love scenes, and to this day I remember the career actor telling a contestant, "There's no such thing as vanilla sex in soap operas."
And that is the philosophy I use in all my sex scenes.
Each sex scene I write has to have its own tone, according to the context of the scene, the people involved, and of course the chemistry between the characters.
It also takes a measure of patience and a little bit of choreography. :-)"
Jon Bradbury, male erotica author
Not in my opinion. You may have to have great sex to write great sex scenes, though! When it comes to writing love scenes, what's more important is knowing what it feels like to fall in love and being able to recreate the tension, the excitement and the chemistry between the characters. Both characters need to be very appealing, and it's best if you can make readers root for them to be together despite any conflicts or hurdles.
Bonnie Trachtenberg, author of Wedlocked and Neurotically Yours
The answer is a big no. The love scenes I create as a writer have nothing to do with me personally. I'm just a conduit to the page. Each scene written is about the characters of the story and the chemistry the couples create together. Sometimes the loving is slow and sensual, at other times fast and frantic. It really depends on the story itself and what each character brings to the table. Every word written must be authentic to who they are.
Cate Beauman, upcoming author of the Bodyguards of L.A. County Series
My ego demands that I claim to have great sex and that I write great sex scenes. While I’m speaking for that side of me, I have a great butt, look like a twenty year old and sing like Celine Dion. Now, outside of my fantasy, I realize that there are many reasons to have sex and regardless of the acts performed, the motivation behind the deed determines the greatness. Did the characters just meet in a bar to hook up? Or have they had a passion between them since the moment they laid eyes on each other and are aching for the moment they can show their love and be a part of each other? Maybe I’m just a romantic, but I think most adults have had that feeling in their lives whether or not they’ve had sex. If a writer can translate that feeling to page, to me that is a great love scene.
Melissa Mayberry, author of Mellifica: Devastating First Love, available at Amazon
Melisa Hamling, author of Twenty Weeks, available at Amazon
Faith Mortimer, author of Harvest
I love this question! My husband would love to say yes to this and to some point I have to agree. Although, my characters tend to be different than I am and more experimental, I live precariously through them. Once I write a great scene, I dare to say that my evening is a lot more exciting! :)
Melinda Dozier, upcoming author of Time Changes Everything, to be released on June 3, 2013
Not at all. And sadly, I know this from personal experience. But no one wants to hear about that, now do they? Thankfully, a writer’s job is to use our imagination. Sure, there might be a bit of life experience in there as well—the great and not-as-great experiences. But love/sex scenes are primarily about what women want men to say or do. You know, the kinds of things that don’t always happen in ‘real life’ anyway. Certainly not for all of us. But we all can appreciate the fantasy, that moment when two people connect for the first time and everything becomes right in the world.Which author do you agree with? Comment below.
Lauren Stewart, author of Hyde, an Urban Fantasy, available at Amazon