Writing
dialogue with a dialect can generate controversy and debate, and on occasion,
even animosity among writers and readers.
I
write about a former New York detective working as a police chief in rural east
Tennessee. The accents he’s been exposed to are about as similar as a
Venezuelan and a Glaswegian both attempting to speak understandable English.
Sorry, Scotland.
I
live in the same area where my protagonist works. Coincidently, I’m also an
ex-New Yorker. And through fourteen novelettes and three full-length traditionally
published novels, I’ve used, in varying degrees, east Tennessee, and other
accents.
To
my ear, there are three separate and distinct accents in and around the Great
Smoky Mountains and I write them all. Occasionally I have a “Nu Yawkah” visit
Chief Sam Jenkins and we hear them ask for a “cuppa kawfee” or tell him to “open
a windah” or cut the grass with a “mowah.” I do that so the residents of southern
Appalachia can’t accuse me of picking on them exclusively when some of my
characters use the universal greeting of the region, “Yew doin’ aw rot t’day?”
or any of the other appropriate colloquialisms I hear all the time.
Honest folks, I
don’t embellish or make this up. I only write what I hear—and I have always had
a good ear for languages. That’s why I can speak English fairly well, am
semi-fluent in two other languages, and can swear and order a beer in five
more.
Okay,
let’s look at what the experts say. In his book, THE 38 MOST COMMON FICTION WRITING MISTAKES (And How to Avoid Them), Jack M. Bickham wrote a 2 ¼ page chapter called Don’t Mangle Characters’ Speech. Jack says NEVER deviate from the
King’s English; it may tend to confuse a reader. Prior to his death, Bickham
published about 75 novels and taught English at the University of Oklahoma.
Since
I didn’t like Jack’s answer, I looked further. Everyone’s heard of Stephen King
and may have read one or more of his sci-fi/horror novels. I think we’ll all
agree Stephen has done well for himself in the publishing business. I’m not a
fan of horror stories, so I don’t read his fiction, but I liked and recommend
his book, ON WRITING (A Memoir of the Craft). The first half tells the story of
a young Stephen King teaching high school English in Bangor, Maine, near
poverty, and in danger of having his utilities turned off before he finally
sold the famous CARRIE. The second half is pure advice on how to write fiction
King’s way.
Stephen’s
take on writing dialect is, “Write it the way you hear it.”
And he’s got a
unique accent to duplicate in “Down East” Maine.
Steve,
however, goes on to say, “Don’t substitute apostrophes for the letters you
leave out of the words.”
Example: writin’
rather than writing, should simply be writin, according to King.
So,
I was looking at a stalemate, one for and one ag’in.
While working on
my first full-length novel, A NEW PROSPECT, I hired Bill Greenleaf, a retired
editor, book doctor, and author of nine novels.
Bill agreed with
King and said, “Write it as you hear it; it’s more authentic when dealing with
characters who speak with a unique accent.”
He further stated
that new writers probably shouldn’t just omit letters, as suggested by King, without
using the substitute apostrophe. Stephen’s way may only confuse editors,
thinking you might be submitting a manuscript with typos.
Sad but true—a guy
like Stephen King can get away with much more than you or I.
A NEW PROSPECT was
published and the publisher/editor accepted all the dialect without question.
Since I’ve
mentioned that book twice and at my age, I no longer have any modesty, I’ll
tell you it was named best mystery at the 2011 Indie Book Awards, First
Runner-up from all commercial fiction at the 2012 Eric Hoffer Book Awards, and
was a finalist for a Montaigne Medal and First Horizon Award. So I guess the
dialect hasn’t been too troubling to the judges who read the review copies.
My second novel, A LEPRECHAUN’S LAMENT, being handled by a new publisher, not only features
characters with thick east Tennessee accents, but several with English “black
country” accents or Irish brogues. The folks at Iconic Publishing are
comfortable with the accents written as they would like the reader to “hear”
them.
Additionally, both
the publisher and editor at Mind Wings Audio where they’ve produced my
novelettes as audio books and simultaneously published them as eBooks have
accepted everything written with oodles of Tennessee dialect. The actor who
reads the text says he has fun shifting voices. (A novelette is defined as
something between 7,500 and 17,500 words.)
Some readers or
reviewers of my works say, “I’m from the south and I don’t speak like that.”
Understandable.
Someone from Charleston, South Carolina or Paducah, Kentucky sounds nothing
like someone from Cocke County, Tennessee. Someone from Nashville in middle
Tennessee doesn’t remotely sound like someone from the Smokies.
To these
complainers I say, “If you’ve never been in my neck of the woods, don’t comment
on how my neighbors speak.” Not only can I state with authority how a resident
of east Tennessee sounds (I’ve been here for twenty years) but I lived in New
York for forty-six years and know first-hand that someone from Brooklyn speaks
nothing like a resident of Buffalo, and both possess distinct accents.
Recently, a reviewer
said, “Writing in dialect never
works.”
I’m suspicious of
someone who uses absolutes like always or never. When I hear that, I tend to
wonder where they derive their expertise on the subject upon which they
commented.
This reviewer claimed,
“It would be enough to state that the character spoke with a heavy accent.”
Isn’t that telling
and not showing? Just the opposite of what good writers are supposed to do.
George Peleconos
has written a successful series of novels featuring Derek Strange, an African
American private detective working in Washington DC. Peleconos extensively
writes dialogue in Ebonics. And it only makes sense. The jive-ass, hip-hop,
gangsta-rapping, young drug dealers Derek encounters during his adventures do
not speak like little old men from Cedar Rapids, Iowa. In my opinion, it
would not sound authentic and would detract from the story if he omitted the
dialect.
And I should
mention an old book with lots of dialect and a pretty fair track record: THE ADVENTURES OF HUCKLEBERRY FINN by a guy who called himself Mark Twain
Some readers have
told me, “Reading dialects makes me slow down.”
So what? What’s
the hurry? Do you want to absorb and understand a novel or just knock out
another book and add one more to your “I’ve read” list?
Shifting from one
writer’s voice to another causes me to slow down until I pick up the cadence
and get in tune with a different style. In only a few pages most readers should
click with something new.
Sometimes, I think
semi-professional readers (self-styled, unpaid reviewers) cruise through books
so fast they really can’t write an honest or intelligent review.
Another opinion
(mine), “Everyone should savor a good book. Slow down and smell the printer’s
ink.”
Wayne Zurl grew up on Long Island
and retired after twenty years with the Suffolk County Police Department, one
of the largest municipal law enforcement agencies in New York and the nation.
For thirteen of those years he served as a section commander supervising
investigators. He is a graduate of SUNY, Empire State College and served on
active duty in the US Army during the Vietnam War and later in the reserves.
Zurl left New York to live in the foothills of the Great Smoky Mountains of
Tennessee with his wife, Barbara.
.For more information on Wayne’s
Sam Jenkins mystery series see www.waynezurlbooks.net.
You can read excerpts, reviews and endorsements, interviews, coming events, and
see photos of the area where the stories take place.
Wayne's Amazon Author Page
B&N link: http://barnesandnoble.com/s/wayne-zurl
Mind Wings Audio link: http://mindwingsaudio.com/?s=wayne+zurl
.
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